Can Autistic People Have Kids?

Autistic people face many challenges that typically-developing people don’t face. They may have trouble with regular communication, with social skills and with basic life skills such as brushing their teeth or getting dressed.

While these are all barriers that lie ahead of them, it’s in no way true that autistic people can’t live happy, successful and fulfilling lives.

For many people, a major component of such a life is what falls under the typical definition of the “American Dream.” That is, finding someone to spend your life with, possibly getting married, owning a home and having children.

The joy of being a parent isn’t something that autistic people are excluded from experiencing. In fact, many autistic people have similar aspirations and desires of neurotypical people, and starting a family is one of the most common desires.

Below, we discuss what parenthood can look like for autistic people.

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How Autism Can Affect Parenthood

Autism doesn’t affect everyone in the same way. There are varying degrees of autism and the symptoms and challenges that comes along with it.

That’s why today, it’s referred to by doctors and professionals in the field as autism spectrum disorder (ASD). This term represents how autism is a wide and diversified developmental disorder that doesn’t present itself in the same ways for all people.

Because of this, there isn’t really a simple and straightforward answer to how autism can affect parenthood. There’s nothing biologically that prevents autistic people from having kids.

Some autistic people may not face many “extra” challenges at all related to their disability. Others, though, may encounter additional obstacles to parenting related to communication, the ability to teach their children and the ability to care for their children.

Like any other individual, then, there are many important factors to weigh for people on the autism spectrum who want to have children.

Challenges Autistic Parents May Face

There are many different challenges that people on the autism spectrum may face as parents.

Anyone who is a parent knows that parenthood comes with a wide range of emotions — from extra worrying to guilt, distress, anxiety and, of course, happiness. Many parents experience an extreme emotional burden associated with having children, and these emotions can become heightened in autistic people.

Here are some of the ways in which a parent’s autism may affect them when they have children.

Sensory Stimuli

Children can be noisy, smelly and messy. At times, it may feel like being a parent is figuring out how to live among chaos.

This can be challenging for any parent, but can be even more so for autistic people. That’s people some people who have autism have sensory needs or struggle with certain sensory stimuli.

Some autistic people, for example, have trouble with loud and/or sudden noises, and need space and time away from that noise when it’s happening. That certainly presents a challenge when it comes to being a parent, since it’s next to impossible to control the noise that children create, especially when they’re infants.

Routine

Many autistic people thrive on routine. Some can experience significant anxiety and stress when their daily routines are disrupted in even minor ways.

The challenge here is that being a parent often means needing to figure out how to adapt quickly to changing situations and being flexible with routines. This doesn’t come natural to a lot of people, but especially to people on the autism spectrum.

People who have autism and face challenges in this regard need to figure out how they can cope with such routine disruptions so that they don’t have huge emotional reactions that might lead to their children having a meltdown.

Mental Health

New parents experience many new emotions they may not have experienced before. This is especially true for new mothers, who have to deal with being a new parent but also with the physical and biological changes it causes.

It’s not uncommon for new mothers, in fact, to experience postpartum depression. This condition is extremely challenge for all mothers, but it can present even more serious challenges to autistic people, who may already deal with mental health issues such as depression and anxiety.

Being a new mother or a new father can exacerbate these already-existing mental health issues, which emphasizes how important it is to have a support system in place.

Isolation

Some autistic people have smaller social circles than neurotypical individuals. This means they might not have the same community support system that many parents need.

In other words, the “it takes a village” saying may already not apply to them, since they don’t have this “village” at their disposal already.

Being a parent could make autistic parents feel even more isolated and, as a result, cause their children to eventually feel this same isolation — whether or not their children are autistic.

Not only that, but being an advocate for your children necessitates parents speak up at times — with people in the medical field, in social situations or with a teacher, for example. Doing these things may be extra challenging for autistic people who might experience anxiety in speaking their mind.

Blue Gems ABA Helps Autistic Children Build Skills

Being on the autism spectrum certainly does not preclude individuals from becoming parents and being great ones at that. At the same time, some autistic people may face extra challenges that neurotypical individuals do not.

That’s why getting an autism diagnosis, and related applied behavioral analysis (or ABA therapy) treatment early is so essential in helping individuals build the social, emotional, communication and essential daily skills they need to succeed in life.

At Blue Gems ABA, our team of dedicated and licensed BCBAs work hard every day to ensure children on the autism spectrum build the skills they need to live fulfilling and successful lives.

For more information, please contact us today.